Marked for Life by The Twilight Zone

Do any of you recognize this face?

Please, let me introduce a classic film short... and a great case of real life “deja vu.” But first, who does this woman, featured in An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge, look like? If you ever lived in Navasota, Texas,and knew everybody that mattered to the community as a whole, you have to know... who this looks like.

This film was based on a story written by Ambrose Bierce and appeared on the Twilight Zone when I was a boy. It impacted my life in several ways including some that I am still discovering. I was only eight years old when I saw it, for the only time in my life, and now I learn that the reason that I watched a thousand Twilight Zone re-runs over my lifetime, in hopes of seeing it again, and never saw it in almost sixty years, was that the Twilight Zone television show only purchased limited broadcast rights to it.

Owl Creek Bridge was a short film made in France! And only edited by the Twilight Zone... no doubt formatted for its time slot and commercials, and it was a hit and won several awards- and my lifelong enthusiasm with very, very limited exposure; Two broadcasts... I saw one of them... in 1962.

It's main character was named Peyton Farquhar... which means nothing to most people, but in Navasota, there is a Farquhar street in the center of downtown by that name, and runs right by City Hall, and the Post Office, and dead ends right into a building where I spent a great deal of time and energy... now known as Classic Rock Coffee Co. But I did not know that wne I was eight, or remember any of the details, as the man's name was barely mentioned... and in the beginning, which had me mesmerized, and stupified.

I just saw it again after many years of wishing to see see it again. Remembering it hard, reconstructing it in my mind, as the years passed, suddenly, by the miracle of Netflix, it was ON!

As a boy I was raised in a history rich environment, injected with a powerful dose of Southern pride. My brother and I played Civil War every day. We had kepis and muskets and knew our generals... and a few battles... mostly we fantasized fighting and dying for the South. When this Twilight Zone came into my living room, it grabbed me, held me, captured me, executed me, and left me for dead. The Confederate spy in the story was me, and I went through his ordeal repeatedly in my mind for the rest of my life.

The theme obviously hit close to home, but it was something else which I could not recognize as an eight year old, and upon seeing again, now understand why the show appealed so much to my soul. The film is a masterpiece of art; The creepy bluesy vocalist, singing as the spy watches his life flash by. “I want to be a LIVING MAN.” (That should have been the name of the segment) The singer has the appeal of a Captain Kangaroo children's entertainer, as he slowly elaborates the beauty of nature, the wonder of Creation... “I see the treeeeees... every vein on the leeeeeeaves...” A man about to die realizes how much he loved life, how much of life there was still to live... how he would give anything to just go home again, and he envisions running home barefooted through the wilderness, and seeing his adoring wife and children one more time.

That hunger, that value stayed, anchored in me like a peg on the wall, and something to hang my identity on. I saw that sweet, loving face of his wife coming happily towards him... but never quite reaching him... for six damn decades! THAT is good art. And that was the day I knew... there was no glory in war so great as a single leaf on a tree.

I did not want to die for the Confederacy... a cause long lost, I wanted to spend my life doing what that poor schmuck hanging from the bridge would never get to do. His yearning, his regrets, his brief, unrealized fantasy became my lifetime of fulfillment and achievement. I still pretended, and played Civil War after that, but I knew I never wanted to stupidly throw my life away. And this was important at that time, as I was soon to go through a boyhood hell and want to end my life. I'm sure now, as I think about it, that the dead rebel hanging from the railroad bridge figured heavily in my mind one Saturday morning when I hunkered down under the fronds of a palm tree in my front yard with a butcher knife, determined to end my anguish. I thought I wanted to die. But the picture of that Confederate spy running and running and never quite saving himself, leaving so beautiful a life behind, stuck with me. Death in youth was a terrible waste. He was dead, but I could still have the life and fulfillment which he could not.

I had forgotten the lack of dialogue in the film, which made the emotions portrayed so much more important. I had completely missed the stream of conscious singing... the violence of the waterfall, but I had fixated on the long, long run home... and the reaching... reaching, to the breaking point... the final embrace as the condemned man actually falls to his death at the end of a rope, which rocked my world. It was the first time I had ever seen a show that did not end with a happy ending. He was supposed to get away and reinforce my juvenile sense of justice. Instead the show went on for many minutes, making you think that somehow he had struggled free and was going to go home to his family. Just as in life, death came with a terrible shock. It was as effective and sobering as any thing I have seen since. It possessed with my eight-year old mind, and never let go. That is the power of art.

I was not the only celebrated writer to love the piece- Kurt Vonnegut said it was the greatest American Short Story ever written. He called it a flawless example of American Genius.

Bizarrely, as I finally saw it again, playing the two main roles were actors who could have been doubles for two friends of mine. All of these years there was a strange familiarity... they were the physical and temperamental embodiment of the characters in the film. Him, a melancholy folk musician, she a loving soul, once a popular children's day-care provider. Seeing them again... in this haunting film, familiar faces in a film which owned a part of me, added another real-life layer to the Twilight Zone.

Of course, I grew up to be... an artist, a historical illustrator, a photographer and writer. A bird watcher... and a happily married man, to a beautiful Southern belle, going on 45 years. And she loves the Twilight Zone. I am the LIVING MAN!

So the actor was Roger Jacquet. The Actress Anne Cornaly... or so they said... But if you are from Navasota, you will watch it with... a certain kind of myst in your eye.

Now, start voting as you hum the Twilight Zone theme song.